Tracee Ellis Ross posted this video on Instagram last year and ever since, it’s gone viral. So many points in this video, I believe are connected to self acceptance. When I watched this video initially last year, I was in a different space in life. I loved the message, but wasn’t able to appreciate the truth and reality behind it. This video is a beautiful reminder of how and why we should be gentle with ourselves. It highlights real moments in our lives, and how we should navigate through them.
Yes, we have many great days, but we also experience many bad days, exhausting days, and defeated days. It’s during those days when we often tend to neglect and mistreat ourselves. When I would personally have bad days, something would go wrong, or when I would simply be going through some type of hardship, I wasn’t able to always connect with myself. I would often allow my circumstances to control my moods and my decisions. It took several falls to the ground, before I was able to realize that, I needed to do something different through my hardships. I needed to be more present for myself. I needed to show up, for me. There was a time in my life when everything seemed to be going wrong and everyone who I thought was there for me, wasn’t. Everything and everyone seemed so far away. Doesn’t it always seem like when it rains it pours? Well I went through a recent period in my life where nothing seemed to be going right. I loss my job, faced major financial hardship, didn’t even know how or if my bills would be paid, while all this was happening I was also going through a heartbreak. With all of these events occurring in my life, it was so easy for me to curl up and want to hide. Yes, I allowed myself to have moments of sadness, and moments of Netflix binges & ice cream, but I didn’t stay there. I knew I owed myself more. I showed up for me. I was still able to do the next indicated thing, and that’s the message I believe Tracee was relaying. When we show up, we are making ourselves a priority, we are simply saying yes to ourselves.
In the video, she also speaks on how we shouldn’t push through life, but simply walk through. This resonated with me so deeply, because I use to think no matter how I got through, as long as I got through, was all that mattered. This is unfortunately not the case. Getting through life is not what matters most, what matters is how you choose to get through it. We can get through it forcefully and miss out on the beauty of the present, or we can get through it gracefully and embrace the beauty of the present moments. There’s a significant difference between pushing and walking your way through life. When we push, we aren’t being gentle with ourselves. We aren’t giving ourselves the opportunity to truly embrace our current moment for what it is. I like to think of pushing through as a very resistant way of getting through life. Instead, when we walk through anyway, we are being gentle with ourselves. Doing what’s necessary for us, in a gentle way. Moving along in life, while also acknowledging our circumstances. In no way at all am I suggesting that it’s possible to act as if our circumstances don’t exist; yet I’m simply suggesting that you decide to move gracefully in muddy waters. Tracee ends the video with stating that “ I’m not pretending that I’m not afraid or not sad but I’m not letting it be the thing that I lead with.”
What will you choose to lead with? In all that you do, always choose to be gentle with yourselves. Let’s practice more of saying “yes” to ourselves, and understanding the value in walking through life despite our circumstance. I hope that you choose to show up, that you choose you, that you always know that despite what happens, you’re coming home to (you.)
Light & Love,